The 1st Annual Spike VGAs Trailer Awards

 
 

Over the weekend, Spike’s VGAs (or Video Game Awards) have come and gone. I’m not certain who appointed the network responsible for giving us Striperella and The Joe Schmo Show as the Academy of Video Games, but it is what it is. Despite its disastrous beginnings in 2003 (to give you some indication, Madden won Game of the Year that year), like a fine cheese, it has slowly improved with time, earning some credibility in the industry. I say “some” credibility, because a good portion of the show is funded by game companies; specifically, those that pay to have their trailers shown on-air during the broadcast. The VGAs have become more like the Super Bowl than the Oscars; despite its general acceptance by the industry, most gamers watch it for the fun, the spectacle, and first and foremost, for the trailers.

With that in mind, I, the Q, am proud to bring you:

THE 1st ANNUAL SPIKE VGAS TRAILER AWARDS

(I apologize for the lack of logo; our marketing budget ran out fairly quickly when we discovered we weren’t receiving any funds from game companies. Maybe next year, EA?)

Tonight, we bring you our choices, voted upon by our professional committee of judges (me, myself, and I), for the top trailers of the 2011 Spike Video Game Awards!

#3: Diablo III Cinematic Intro

If nothing else, this cinematic just oozes pure cool for showing the war between angels and demons. Unfortunately, all this trailer served to do was just make me want to play the game, which is precisely what a trailer should do, but this was not something I was lacking going in. I already know I want this game like a dog wants to chew an itch. It’s like getting a case of Diablo Blue Balls.

Let’s look at the rest after the Break.

#2: Transformers: Fall of Cybertron

[Fade in company logos as soft, sad, droning guitar plays. Fade in to Our Hero carrying an injured comrade across a battlefield, silently trying to reassure him as chaos rages around him. One by one, soldiers fall to the blade or cannon fire on both sides. His nemesis faces him across the expanse and issues forth a war cry, sending his forces and his champion to battle. Our Hero looks over his shoulder, seeing his own champion prepare for battle and give a rage-filled roar.]
Yeah, it’s like that. But with Transformers. A truly artistic piece, beautifully amplified by Maynard James Keenan’s “The Humbling River.” Magnifique.

#1: Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance

WHAT?! DID YOU SEE THAT?! OHHHH DUDE THAT GUY JUST SPLIT INTO LIKE 300 PIECES AND… WOAAAHH.
My jaw was somewhere around the region of my belt the whole time I watched this. It was the last trailer I watched, thinking it was just going to be another Metal Gear game, and since I’m not a fan of stealth games, I was only watching it as a matter of being thorough. But this is made by Platinum Games, the creators of Bayonetta, and it shows in every way. Before this weekend, I would have thought the word “revengeance” was an idiotic redunancy. Now it’s my favorite word in the whole goddamn English language. Pardon me while I go pre-order this.

Honorable Mention: The Last of Us

Hey, I’m back from pre-ordering Rising, what’d I miss? Wait, was that a trailer for Dead Island or something? Didn’t I play this game already?
Ok, sure, it does look very impressive, both from a graphical and cinematic perspective. It’ll have amazing dialogue and probably fewer bugs. I expect Naughty Dog, of all companies, to put together something that feels real. I’ll play it and most likely enjoy it, but I’ll probably go back to Dead Island when I want some good old-fashioned multiplayer zombie questing.