Christmas-time is usually this kind of orgy of presents, family, and
food. But, as I tend to do, I try to think of it as a game as
well. When your family asks you what for Christmas and you tell
them you want Metal Gear Solid III: Snake Eater and, with a bewildered
look on their face, they spit something like “Feter Weter Wogid Tree:
Lake Peeer,” you can kind of gather what I mean. Trying to
explain your desire to take a man named Snake through the 60’s jungle
to stop crazy Russians with super-powers sounds so good when you think
about it in your head. It’s only when you say it that it becomes
questionable.
As a gamer it is something you’ve come to expect. You know
full-well that when you ask for games, especially when you are a
teenager and higher, the adults begin to wonder why you don’t enjoy normal things
like Old Navy shirts and boobs. They get you your wogidy lake
peer, but only with a feeling of dissapointment stuck in their belly.
My parents tried to anti-geek me earlier on in my life by buying me
clothes for Christmas instead of games. This didn’t work, and all
it did was leave unworn clothes in my closet, and I’d “waste” my own
money on these games I decided to play. Eventually they realized
that it wasn’t a phase, and truly was a part of me and decided to give
in. They give me geeky things now. Well, I must say they
haven’t completely given up their conversion. They still try to
throw in a few items at me. It’s like trying to throw dicks at a
lesbian, though. Just not interested.
I’m also the only one in my family that is Jewish (in practice), so I
celebrate Chanukah all by my lonesome with no presents. Which is
actually kind of nice. I get all of my spiritualness out with it,
and then get my commercial side a work out with Christmas. I
guess you could say I get the best of both worlds. Some would
even say I’m getting the worst of both. It works for me, though,
and I’m not complaining.
As I was trying to say earlier, though, this whole time of the year is
about finding out just who your relatives think you are and just what
you can do to show them what you are… or else. The present
opening arena is like an unspoken battlefield. There’s tention
there, everyone’s felt it. You know which presents will be good,
and then with a feeling in the pit of your stomach, you move on to the
ones that will have stuff you’ll never use.
My family did a good job of getting me things that I will use. They
know me well, and covered most avenues of what people have come to
call Matthew, or on occasion BreakmanX. My favorite show in this
universe is Aqua Teen Hunger Force. It lets me feel stoned
without actually having to be stoned. The humor in it is
something that consistantly makes me laugh, which is a good
thing. She covered my gaming self with Link’s Awakening for my
GBA, which I play on my DS. Nothing says good gift like Zelda,
and this is one of my most favorite games ever. As far as music
goes, it might be number one. She framed a cool picture of us,
which covers my ‘reality’ side. And since I occasionally drink
water, and other things, she made me a nice big cup. Mecha even
saw me make tea and pour it in it the other night. Some seriously
hot shit. And of course, she finished off my unwrapping happyness
with a Nintendo t-shirt. Delish.
On the geek front, I also got a 300 GB hard drive which will be
excellent for the video shiznat we will be bringing you this
year. I know I’m excited.
And remember people, don’t ever take anything at face value.
Always dig deeper. If there’s nothing deeper, than it is most
likely not worth your time.
Have a wonderful New Year, and we’ll see you in 2005!
